October is national anti-bullying month.
I have posted about my passion to end bullying for a long time. I have talked about several life changing events as a child and as an adult. Its no surprise I believe in people, especially women being more supportive of one another, and less competitive.
Its funny, the happier I am, the more i attract bullies. Maybe its my confidence and the fact that my weight doesn't stop me from doing what i want, speaking the truth, or standing up for what I believe in.
I have especially had a bad experience at a "size acceptance" bar I have been going to for years, and in my work environment. Funny both of those places are filled with miserable, insecure, catty women. If you confront someone in a bathroom for any reason, yes you are a bully. If you stalk my every move and post, yes you are a bully.
I recently was with friends at knotts scary farm, and we had a terrible experience the entire night really. Apparently these "monsters" that work there are now present day bullies. Apparently from what they told me, they are paid to be mean. I always thought it was to scare and frighten. Guess that wasn't enough anymore. The employees made several remarks insulting weight, appearance, and sexuality.
What went on, wasn't right and very hostile. I did my part in standing up for the right thing. If you talk to me personally you know what I am referring to.
Obviously by the news , we can see the extreme effects bullying has on young people today and their mental health. Suicide, self harming, shootings, Its totally out of control. However how can we really expect this to change and when adults set the example?! I mean it makes no sense. An adult should be the bigger, respectful person, not the instigator.
If you know someone is suffering, of any age, please reach out to them.You never know who you may help.
http://www.stopbullying.gov/prevention/in-the-community/community-action-planning/index.html
Monday, October 22, 2012
Monday, August 20, 2012
Party Idea-Retro Cowgirl
I have this current obsession with having a retro cowgirl themed party.
It seriously will not get out of my damn head.
If I was having a birthday party, this would be it. Although I am the queen of themed parties, its hard to get others to dress up.
I just think the attire, and party decor would be fabulous.
My vision is an outdoor party including the following:
Hay for sitting
Gingham table clothes
Old school country music
BBQ food, including watermelon triangles and corn on the cob
Galvanized buckets for drinks
Root bear bottles
Red bandannas
Those old school stick ponies
Mason jars, probably on the tables with candles
twirling, if i knew how
I want it to feel like you are at a vintage western party, not too juvenile. IF I move to Texas, and throw myself a party, ill do this for sure.
It seriously will not get out of my damn head.
If I was having a birthday party, this would be it. Although I am the queen of themed parties, its hard to get others to dress up.
I just think the attire, and party decor would be fabulous.
My vision is an outdoor party including the following:
Hay for sitting
Gingham table clothes
Old school country music
BBQ food, including watermelon triangles and corn on the cob
Galvanized buckets for drinks
Root bear bottles
Red bandannas
Those old school stick ponies
Mason jars, probably on the tables with candles
twirling, if i knew how
I want it to feel like you are at a vintage western party, not too juvenile. IF I move to Texas, and throw myself a party, ill do this for sure.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Dear California,
I doubt our relationship is going to last very long.
Yes, I was born and raised here, and pretty much lived all over southern California. However I am just an old soul, and you and I are like oil and water.
I've never felt like I belong in this state, I am far from a beach girl, I grew up in poverty, too fat to be popular, and too friendly to be here.
Even to this day, if I walk into a bar in the Newport/Mesa area, everyone stares at me. Like I am something they've never seen. I only go out when I am done up, so one night i really couldn't figure out why? I looked around and realized I was the only girl with black hair, much less being thick and having a dark lip.
Don't even try making friendly conversation with someone you don't know. They'll either think you are hitting on them, or just crazy.
Also I do not smoke, anything!!!! I am blue in the face with everyone's obsession with marijuana here. Get.the.fuck.over.it.people. God created better things.
I will never afford a home here, and I am clearly not what a rich man wants in this state, so I have to think about my own future. I make decent money, and it somehow evaporates. The taxes for a single person are insane. I am so sick of living in random rooms, ghettos, and places. I want to work and afford a decent apartment, that is clean and safe. I think I deserve this.
Years ago when I first went to Boston, I fell in love. I knew California wasn't for me. If I could afford B-town, id be there. I've been to Boston 3 times, NYC once, and Washington.
I am so over the demanding people here, they speak to you like you owe them something and as of yesterday at that. Since I work on the phone all day, some of these people just make me sick. The only time I've heard a "yes mam/thank you mam" is on a Texas call. Imagine that.
I've never been to Texas, and I am at a point where I don't even care.
If I had a choice, I would move to Austin. In order to transfer my job, I have to go to Irving, Texas. It is outside of Dallas. There are tons of job, and nice affordable housing. Its very hard to find a job from another state, unless you have some special skills.
Leaving my Grandparents was something I could never even imagine. Since losing my Grandma, I feel more alone than ever. I need some major life changes to occur to get my joy back. I heard her voice when she died, just saying "go Nicole, go, you are free now"...
I don't know anyone, and I will miss my Grandpa deeply, but something has got to give.
My current plan is to see what it takes to transfer, and if i can, and go from there.
Yes, I was born and raised here, and pretty much lived all over southern California. However I am just an old soul, and you and I are like oil and water.
I've never felt like I belong in this state, I am far from a beach girl, I grew up in poverty, too fat to be popular, and too friendly to be here.
Even to this day, if I walk into a bar in the Newport/Mesa area, everyone stares at me. Like I am something they've never seen. I only go out when I am done up, so one night i really couldn't figure out why? I looked around and realized I was the only girl with black hair, much less being thick and having a dark lip.
Don't even try making friendly conversation with someone you don't know. They'll either think you are hitting on them, or just crazy.
Also I do not smoke, anything!!!! I am blue in the face with everyone's obsession with marijuana here. Get.the.fuck.over.it.people. God created better things.
I will never afford a home here, and I am clearly not what a rich man wants in this state, so I have to think about my own future. I make decent money, and it somehow evaporates. The taxes for a single person are insane. I am so sick of living in random rooms, ghettos, and places. I want to work and afford a decent apartment, that is clean and safe. I think I deserve this.
Years ago when I first went to Boston, I fell in love. I knew California wasn't for me. If I could afford B-town, id be there. I've been to Boston 3 times, NYC once, and Washington.
I am so over the demanding people here, they speak to you like you owe them something and as of yesterday at that. Since I work on the phone all day, some of these people just make me sick. The only time I've heard a "yes mam/thank you mam" is on a Texas call. Imagine that.
I've never been to Texas, and I am at a point where I don't even care.
If I had a choice, I would move to Austin. In order to transfer my job, I have to go to Irving, Texas. It is outside of Dallas. There are tons of job, and nice affordable housing. Its very hard to find a job from another state, unless you have some special skills.
Leaving my Grandparents was something I could never even imagine. Since losing my Grandma, I feel more alone than ever. I need some major life changes to occur to get my joy back. I heard her voice when she died, just saying "go Nicole, go, you are free now"...
I don't know anyone, and I will miss my Grandpa deeply, but something has got to give.
My current plan is to see what it takes to transfer, and if i can, and go from there.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Sunny week
This week I enjoyed some much needed fun in the sun! Hello its summer!
Based on my almost iridescent skin , you could say I really don't see much sun light. Although my vitamin D is low, and since i don't drink milk, the sun is the next best thing.
Just kidding.
well, not about the milk.
The pale skin is not only healthier, but it kind of goes along with my look as well.
Monday Briana picked me up and we headed to the beach, I enjoyed seeing her family and had a great time. Except my poor red chest, yikes!
I have to say, it was super busy, and this lady was trying to sale her parking spot for $10!!! I mean i thought about picking up this second job, but with my luck the Newport PD would catch me immediately.
Today Pamela invited me to her friends house, I mean castle for a pool party. Its a spectacular place in the hills of San Diego. We hung out in the lovely pool, ate, drank and talked for hours. I wish i had some better photos, but it was hard with the sun and my phone.
It was lovely hanging out with these women. I don't live near either, so i really value the time we can spend together.
Its also really important for me to have quality women in my life right now. Plus who knows how long ill be in California, so i have to make the best of whats around.
Based on my almost iridescent skin , you could say I really don't see much sun light. Although my vitamin D is low, and since i don't drink milk, the sun is the next best thing.
Just kidding.
well, not about the milk.
The pale skin is not only healthier, but it kind of goes along with my look as well.
Monday Briana picked me up and we headed to the beach, I enjoyed seeing her family and had a great time. Except my poor red chest, yikes!
I have to say, it was super busy, and this lady was trying to sale her parking spot for $10!!! I mean i thought about picking up this second job, but with my luck the Newport PD would catch me immediately.
Today Pamela invited me to her friends house, I mean castle for a pool party. Its a spectacular place in the hills of San Diego. We hung out in the lovely pool, ate, drank and talked for hours. I wish i had some better photos, but it was hard with the sun and my phone.
It was lovely hanging out with these women. I don't live near either, so i really value the time we can spend together.
Its also really important for me to have quality women in my life right now. Plus who knows how long ill be in California, so i have to make the best of whats around.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Props
I am a big YouTube fan, no doubt. Mostly my attention goes to fashion, makeup, beauty, music and some other randoms.
This gal came up in the right sidebar, so i clicked! She literally makes me laugh hysterically in all her videos, I love her sense of humor. Its right up my alley!
It really makes me happy when people are honest and open about depression and anxiety. Hearing people talk about it is always really refreshing. Honestly I truly think it needs to be done more often. I am obviously one of those people who puts things out there, i am very honest and straight forward and open about this disease. Yes I know it has pushed people away, and that is totally fine. I am on a constant route of improvement, and trying new things to deal with this.
I think a lot of self harm, stems from those who cant be open about what they suffer from. I can say I haven't gotten to the point of any physical self harm, or street drug use at this point. So you can hate me and what i stand for, but with the genetics in my family, I am pretty shocked I have yet to fall into that trap.
Grateful for sure.
If I could afford a good camera and imac i would be making videos, about a number of things, but mental health issues would surely be one of them.
Another good site to those who feel alone, is http://us.reachout.com/
I've come across a lot of people dependent on anti anxieties/depressants/marijuana, yet never face the underlining issue. Obviously I don't have a problem with prescription drugs, under the care of a doctor. However most people don't really face whats going on, don't talk about it, refuse to get therapy or make no life changes. There are women i work with that will pop a Xanax, but who knows the last time they saw a psychiatrist. Hello, kind of a problem.
Genetically, I have a ridiculously high drug tolerance. Almost nothing helps. Talking to someone however, is helpful. My psychiatrist is my favorite person, literally. She truly sees the good in me, and makes me laugh. Its fabulous. One day Ill move on and hopefully wont need her, but i don't really even want that to happen haaha.
Anyway my point was, I really really really love this fun girl from Texas! I hope someone else can get something out of her as well.
Its estimated 1 out of 10 US adults suffer from depression.
http://www.adaa.org/understanding-anxiety
Anxiety disorders are the most common psychiatric illnesses affecting children and adults. An estimated 40 million American adults suffer from anxiety disorders. Only about one-third of those suffering from an anxiety disorder receive treatment, even though the disorders are highly treatable
This gal came up in the right sidebar, so i clicked! She literally makes me laugh hysterically in all her videos, I love her sense of humor. Its right up my alley!
It really makes me happy when people are honest and open about depression and anxiety. Hearing people talk about it is always really refreshing. Honestly I truly think it needs to be done more often. I am obviously one of those people who puts things out there, i am very honest and straight forward and open about this disease. Yes I know it has pushed people away, and that is totally fine. I am on a constant route of improvement, and trying new things to deal with this.
I think a lot of self harm, stems from those who cant be open about what they suffer from. I can say I haven't gotten to the point of any physical self harm, or street drug use at this point. So you can hate me and what i stand for, but with the genetics in my family, I am pretty shocked I have yet to fall into that trap.
Grateful for sure.
If I could afford a good camera and imac i would be making videos, about a number of things, but mental health issues would surely be one of them.
Another good site to those who feel alone, is http://us.reachout.com/
I've come across a lot of people dependent on anti anxieties/depressants/marijuana, yet never face the underlining issue. Obviously I don't have a problem with prescription drugs, under the care of a doctor. However most people don't really face whats going on, don't talk about it, refuse to get therapy or make no life changes. There are women i work with that will pop a Xanax, but who knows the last time they saw a psychiatrist. Hello, kind of a problem.
Genetically, I have a ridiculously high drug tolerance. Almost nothing helps. Talking to someone however, is helpful. My psychiatrist is my favorite person, literally. She truly sees the good in me, and makes me laugh. Its fabulous. One day Ill move on and hopefully wont need her, but i don't really even want that to happen haaha.
Anyway my point was, I really really really love this fun girl from Texas! I hope someone else can get something out of her as well.
Its estimated 1 out of 10 US adults suffer from depression.
http://www.adaa.org/understanding-anxiety
Anxiety disorders are the most common psychiatric illnesses affecting children and adults. An estimated 40 million American adults suffer from anxiety disorders. Only about one-third of those suffering from an anxiety disorder receive treatment, even though the disorders are highly treatable
Sunday, June 3, 2012
some fun times
Good times were had last week...
On Memorial Day Isabel, Briana, and I got together at Briana's house for a bbq. It was awesome to hang out with them. We went to high school together, and its great we get along and can hang out and chat as adults. I hadn't seen Isabel in like 10 years! I really hope we stay connected, they are both great women.
On Wednesday a long time dream came true! I saw Dita Von Teese!!!! She actually played at the yost theater in downtown Santa Ana. This is like an old time theater inside that recently re opened. It is marvelous inside.
The performance was fantastic. The host was funny, there were dancers in between her acts. She even had a plus size burlesque dancer!!! That of course made me super happy! My favorite set was the finale because i love the Japanese/Geisha stuff.
For 39 years old, she can rock the stage, the outfits, and possess a beautiful pale body. The neat part of going to something like this is seeing everyone dressed up, and running into people from the pinup community.
I finally met my favorite local pin up girl Ashley. I went up to her like a silly fan, but she knew my name!!! I am just sad the photo turned out so blah. Oh well.
It was a great night, and I had a wonderful time with my friend Ryan. I also did a mini bar tour downtown, I went to the playground, the crosby, and chapter one. Its a unique, fun area to go out in.
The crew also got together to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. Wow, 5 years!!!
On Memorial Day Isabel, Briana, and I got together at Briana's house for a bbq. It was awesome to hang out with them. We went to high school together, and its great we get along and can hang out and chat as adults. I hadn't seen Isabel in like 10 years! I really hope we stay connected, they are both great women.
On Wednesday a long time dream came true! I saw Dita Von Teese!!!! She actually played at the yost theater in downtown Santa Ana. This is like an old time theater inside that recently re opened. It is marvelous inside.
The performance was fantastic. The host was funny, there were dancers in between her acts. She even had a plus size burlesque dancer!!! That of course made me super happy! My favorite set was the finale because i love the Japanese/Geisha stuff.
For 39 years old, she can rock the stage, the outfits, and possess a beautiful pale body. The neat part of going to something like this is seeing everyone dressed up, and running into people from the pinup community.
I finally met my favorite local pin up girl Ashley. I went up to her like a silly fan, but she knew my name!!! I am just sad the photo turned out so blah. Oh well.
It was a great night, and I had a wonderful time with my friend Ryan. I also did a mini bar tour downtown, I went to the playground, the crosby, and chapter one. Its a unique, fun area to go out in.
The crew also got together to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. Wow, 5 years!!!
Monday, May 21, 2012
Little Saigon Love
This is my long awaited review of my favorite things in Little Saigon. Today when you think of Garden Grove, you think Vietnamese. Ironically when my Grandparents moved to California, they bought their first home in Garden Grove. I believe it cost around 10,000 and can only imagine how much its worth today. They lived there about 25 years, and when it started to slowly turn into Little Saigon it was time to leave.
In about the 10 years I've individually lived in the Orange County area, it feels like I've lived everywhere. Lots of random areas and places, not so safe, that i hope i never have to go back to.
One thing I appreciate in myself is finding the gems of each area I've been in.
One of my favorite things is Fancy Hair Salon, on brookhurst.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/fancy-hair-salon-garden-grove
Now you are sacrificing environment for the price you pay. Also there will be a language barrier, unless you speak Vietnamese. My best advise is to be very clear, straight forward, firm, and bring pictures. Cash only as well.
I have gotten my hair cut and colored here several times. Now I only get an all over color, black. No foils or highlighting. For my color, cut, blow dry, and even flat ironed or curled I pay around 40$. For me, it makes it all worth it. If you want a cut and blow dry I believe its around $10-14.
Skylark beauty supply
http://www.yelp.com/biz/skylark-nail-and-beauty-supplies-garden-grove
This place is awesome! Its literally the place the nail salons shop at.They have walls and walls of polish, all the same they use at the typical spot, and for $1!!! They have some opi, china glaze, and various crackles for reduced price as well. Also all types of nail files,buffers, scrubbers, ect all super cheap. I would highly recommend the false eyelashes here too. They also have a ton of acrylic nail supplies and tips, all that stuff if you know how to do nails.
I also go to a foot massage place a few doors down, but I don't know the name. Now if you have never been to an Asian foot massage, FYI they massage your entire body. You keep your clothes on and its a room with several people. Its not private. Its $15, and also totally worth it, for an hour!!
The boiling crab is in the same center, its not my thing, however its an extremely popular restaurant among all types of people.
Now we know most all nail places employ the Viet, but its funny, in the LS area there aren't really a lot of nail places. You can find basic pedicures and manicures, but that's about it. I go to Long Beach for my nails :)
Last year I purchased my birthday cake from a Viet bakery called Givral.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/givral-bakery-westminster
It was beautiful! They don't bake sweet like we do, so I asked a lot of questions and did chocolate on chocolate and made sure I stressed the fact that I like sweet and rich. I believe it cost me around $50.
These bakeries are where all the Vietnamese get their engagement and wedding cakes.
I am pretty sure everyone knows about Lees Coffee. They are all over the place. I have tried Viet coffee at lots of places and theirs is the best. I love the vanilla ice coffee, and they have good egg rolls. I think a bauget is like $1. Most people are really into their sandwiches is well. The one in GG is actually open 24 hours!
Very recently I went to a traditional Viet restaurant. That is just one thing I'll stay away from. I didn't like the food, at all. I really didn't think it was worth the price, and over all I was not impressed.
I hope you'll try some of the places I love!!!
In about the 10 years I've individually lived in the Orange County area, it feels like I've lived everywhere. Lots of random areas and places, not so safe, that i hope i never have to go back to.
One thing I appreciate in myself is finding the gems of each area I've been in.
One of my favorite things is Fancy Hair Salon, on brookhurst.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/fancy-hair-salon-garden-grove
Now you are sacrificing environment for the price you pay. Also there will be a language barrier, unless you speak Vietnamese. My best advise is to be very clear, straight forward, firm, and bring pictures. Cash only as well.
I have gotten my hair cut and colored here several times. Now I only get an all over color, black. No foils or highlighting. For my color, cut, blow dry, and even flat ironed or curled I pay around 40$. For me, it makes it all worth it. If you want a cut and blow dry I believe its around $10-14.
Skylark beauty supply
http://www.yelp.com/biz/skylark-nail-and-beauty-supplies-garden-grove
This place is awesome! Its literally the place the nail salons shop at.They have walls and walls of polish, all the same they use at the typical spot, and for $1!!! They have some opi, china glaze, and various crackles for reduced price as well. Also all types of nail files,buffers, scrubbers, ect all super cheap. I would highly recommend the false eyelashes here too. They also have a ton of acrylic nail supplies and tips, all that stuff if you know how to do nails.
I also go to a foot massage place a few doors down, but I don't know the name. Now if you have never been to an Asian foot massage, FYI they massage your entire body. You keep your clothes on and its a room with several people. Its not private. Its $15, and also totally worth it, for an hour!!
The boiling crab is in the same center, its not my thing, however its an extremely popular restaurant among all types of people.
Now we know most all nail places employ the Viet, but its funny, in the LS area there aren't really a lot of nail places. You can find basic pedicures and manicures, but that's about it. I go to Long Beach for my nails :)
Last year I purchased my birthday cake from a Viet bakery called Givral.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/givral-bakery-westminster
It was beautiful! They don't bake sweet like we do, so I asked a lot of questions and did chocolate on chocolate and made sure I stressed the fact that I like sweet and rich. I believe it cost me around $50.
These bakeries are where all the Vietnamese get their engagement and wedding cakes.
I am pretty sure everyone knows about Lees Coffee. They are all over the place. I have tried Viet coffee at lots of places and theirs is the best. I love the vanilla ice coffee, and they have good egg rolls. I think a bauget is like $1. Most people are really into their sandwiches is well. The one in GG is actually open 24 hours!
Very recently I went to a traditional Viet restaurant. That is just one thing I'll stay away from. I didn't like the food, at all. I really didn't think it was worth the price, and over all I was not impressed.
I hope you'll try some of the places I love!!!
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